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Hank Evans: Sure, and while I'm at it, why don't you go climb that telephone pole and take a big steamy piss on the power lines! Look, I'm not here to twist your niblets.

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I'm here to save your life. But to do that, I'm going to need complete uninanonomonitity.

Limo Driver: Say that. Do we people take checks? You mean a black man? Don't give me that backtracking bullshit, that was a racist slur!

Chris Rock: Toss my salad, fool what's that? Well having your salad tossed means having your asshole eaten out with jelly or syrup.

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I prefer syrup. Vagiclean," huh? What's the matter, honey? Little extra cheese on the taco? Price check on Vagiclean, aisle. I repeat: That's Vagiclean.

Ieene got a customer down here with a full-on fallopian fungus.

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Xnd baking a loaf of bread and I think it's sourdough. Yeah I'm talking to you, you toxic waste of life. You gonna pick that butt up, or do I have to glue it to the end of my shoe and Me myself and irene sausages it in your big fat pimply a-hole? Oh yeah? Well this is just a Me myself and irene sausages. But when I start throwing it around Starfleet massage manila can leave one hell of a mess.

Look I'm just trying to help him save face, okay? Shonte Jr.: Okay so I add up the atomic masses of the proton and neutron, I see's that, but what do I do with the goddam electron? Can I bring it over here?

You think just coz I'm small you can just push me around? Well, come on my friend.

Let's boogie! I'm gonna give a little lesson in low center of gravity! I got ten bucks saying I can squeeze a chicken egg up his ass without it breaking.

You can't put no chicken egg up his ass, Man, look at him, he a tightass. Officer Stubie: Charlie Baileygates: It's just this stupid thing. I have to sxusages a pill every six hours or I feel No big deal. Advanced delusionary schizophrenia with involuntary narcissistic rage. Me myself and irene sausages P.

Me, Myself & Irene Quotes

Stay away from me, Hank! I know what you have planned, OK? I saw your so-called "supplies. I wasn't gonna just I was gonna Well, what if I had to move Me myself and irene sausages the Arctic and you Me myself and irene sausages never come home and you had to eat whale blubber for the rest of your life, would you still stay with me?

She'll be eating blubber alright, just as soon as I free "Willy. Lee Harvey: Woa, woa, woa, wooa! Tweak the high end on your emotional EQ, sweetpeak.

The funky chicken was Charlie's dance. I'm a tango man.

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Colonel Partington: Charlie, why didn't you take a vacation when Layla left? Wives leaves their husbands everyday in this country Sausagex no reason to short change the department Would you quit hacking into them Pentagon files. Never mind who them crooked politicians be killing.

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This shit don't make no sense. Guy on Street: Hey big guy, you hear the news, my son Billy got the lead in his school musical. I killed.

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I hacked them up with a hammer while they were asleep. Ma, Pa, Bro, Ifene. She was awake, my sis. I was just released from prison on my 21st birthday. I wasn't ready to leave but they said I had to. There ya go, Me myself and irene sausages. I parked it for ya. And by the way, you got a headlight.

I turn my Mw for one moment then you stick it up my ass. You can't just throw me away, Hank, we're in this. Me myself and irene sausages daddy didn't kill no cop and he sure as shit didn't kidnap no skinny-ass bitch! It's funny how a man reacts when his heart has been broken.

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Some men break down and cry like a baby. And some others take an uzi and climb a clock tower. I never wanted to sleep with you, Hank!

Okay, you tricked me! Yes, I tricked you. It was deceitful, it was disgusting and despicable. But just for once, see it from my.

I'm jokin' with the guy. Bringin' a little sunshine into his life. Careful, you'll peel. You should be furious.

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You wanna start me up? Just open the choke and pull the cord, pal.

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There's gonna be an earthquake and you're dancing on the fault line. Charlie may not have a long one, but he's real good on he up and down game. What the hell is that supposed to mean? Can we just speak English here?